1. If you are not in a good mood, or tired, don't go to a dinner like this. It will require a lot of concentration, effort, and positive attitude.
2. Try to have the dinner in a favorable environment for you. If you don't like noisy restaurants, or fancy restaurants, don't go there.
3. Sit in the middle of the table. The last thing you want to do is be stuck in the corner with no conversation inclusion.
4. If you know that someone at the table is a major entertainer, sit next to them, but don't get overshadowed by them. You will have to hustle to compete, but the spot light will be very close and accessible to you the whole dinner.
5. If you know someone is very boring, avoid sitting next to them. This is survival of the fittest people. This is not a charity event. Maybe once you become the expert entertainer you can be charitable, but for now focus on you.
6. Possible conversation topics:
- The Food- who, what, where, why?
- Talk about food you have had in other countries
- Talk to the waiters, they are a good easy target for a 2 min convo that could include other members of the table. Potentially change the topic of entire table if necessary
- Ask waiters what their favorite dish is. This is an easy and usually entertaining way to be sure you don't get stuck with the worst dish on the menu.
- Ask Questions about the menu to the others. Ask them what they are ordering
- Talk about similar restaurants.
- Ask what their favorite restaurant is.
- Bring praise to people around you. This is key! "Although this pizza is very good, the best pizza I have ever had was the one XXXX made at his dinner a few weeks ago."
- Say positive uplifting things. Don't be a Debby Downer.
- Tell the person who found the restaurant that it was a golden find.
- Don't get pissed at something someone says. It will ruin your mood and the whole dinner for you.
- Try not to say something that will piss someone off. If it must be said, say it though. You have a right to your opinion. Being honest will get you far.
- Most of the time your conversation will be focused on 1 person for most of the dinner. Pick your partner and don't get stuck on your own. Trying to join an already started convo is tough.
- Read the news before hand. Know what is going on. Ask people what they think about the "nuclear crisis in ...."
- Jokes, find a good joke online before the dinner. This is like a free pass if there is a long awkward silence.
- Focus on the transitions in the conversations. Find good fillers in between. For example if the conversation ends, fill up everyones wine glasses. Ask them how they like the wine....
- Don't take yourself too seriously. Unless it is a work related setting.
7. Making sure to get invited again
- The people need to remember that you were there. You need to make an impact on them. If you just sit quitely and eat, don't even bother. This is the most important thing!
- You need to be an attractive person. Have good manners, be a gentleman, look good.
- Do not spill your wine glass on someone else. Been there, done that. Not a good idea.
- Say interesting things that people WANT to HEAR.
- Do not talk about what you want to say the entire dinner.
8. After the dinner reflection
- Ask yourself what did you bring to the "potluck".
- Did you contribute anything at all?
- Did you just take?
- Did you help someone at the dinner?
- Did you bring someone insight?
- Did you prove someone wrong/crush their beliefs?
- Did you make people laugh?
- Did you laugh?
- etc
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